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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in
izzybeth82's LiveJournal:
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| Sunday, December 24th, 2006 | | 10:02 am |
:) I have been conversing with a dear friend these past few days and largely the reason I'm even on here; I have not been using LJ much since I became addicted to Myspace and now slowly amd waining my addiction from the internet (I just have no time). My life is filled and busy. I work hard, I have a new puppy, and I've been with my boyfriend almost one year -half of that year being 4500 miles away from him (distance blows). But now I get to go back and be with him for a few days, as well as catch up with some dear friends. At any rate.. its been about 6 months since I used this thing, and I'm sorry I've been absent from any events that have been important to you all... My new year resolution is to be more thoughtful and thorough. I hope you have a Very Merry Christmas or whatever holiday you choose is best for you. May have you found peace, success, love, and confidence in your endeavors this year and if not this year.. in the year to come. -Izzy Current Mood:  calm | | Friday, July 7th, 2006 | | 12:06 am |
CONGRATULATIONS MOM AND DAD!!
ok.. I don't have much time so I won't be able to say a lot. I think I've gained about 15 lbs in the three weeks I've been home. This KILLS ME. MUST MOVE BACK NOW! Please let me be bloated from PMS. Secondly,... I am leaving for Florida in about 9 hours. This is the first family vacation we have been on ALL together in about 11 years. pretty much probably to the exact day. I think I had JUST turned 13 when we went to DC. So this is the first family vacation where we all can drive. This is the first family vacation where we are all adults. HA.. and this is the vacation that will be the celebration of my parents 25th Wedding Anniversary!! Congratulations to my parents for making it this far. I'm very proud of them!! Unfortunately two years ago I had it all mapped out to send them on a cruise in the Mediterranean (or anywhere). But with very little funds right now, I can't afford that. I will certainly send them on one come their 30th wedding anniversary. So to Florida we go! Current Mood:  Proud Daughter! | | Tuesday, July 4th, 2006 | | 2:01 am |
I don't know why I can't keep up with this thing anymore. I used to post three and four times a day. Now I do well to post once every three or four months. I'm considering halting my journal, but I'd like to keep record of all my past journals for the future. I guess some say thats not healthy holding onto the past, but I know it was quite upsetting for me as a child not being able to enjoy any of my parents past through mementos. I do know that this point in my life, I'm so happy. My life is wonderful and I know its only going to get better from here. And the one person with which I want to share all of my thoughts and desires, I speak with everyday. So as originally I used this as a medium to convey thoughts to him, how I felt about my life and about him. I don't really feel the necessity for this in that aspect anymore. I do still feel the need to write about my own private thoughts from time to time,.. but.. I just can't find the time anymore and I guess if they are my private thoughts I should keep them to myself. I have started to use Myspace dot com to get in contact with former classmates of mine, and I guess now that has sort of become my addiction. Outside of computers which I don't spend much time with anymore, I've gone back to appreciating things that truly matter to me, such as finding out my heritage. I have been researching countless hours. The challenge is frustrating at times, but satisfying. I've also finally decided what I want to do with my life concerning my career. At 24 things seem to be coming together for me. I feel successful, and I'm just getting started. Time is slipping past me and in some aspects it is exciting and on the other hand scary. I've been back home for three weeks this Wednesday. I've feel like I've been separated from Mies for an eternity. Yet on the other hand, we know we will be apart from each other approx. two years in total minus the occasional visit, but when I think about how fast time is flying by already, the next time I go there it will only be a year and a half til we are together, around a year and a half before I become his fiance. And although I see that time is slipping so quickly around me.. that year and a half.. Now still two years is exciting for me, and doesn't seem so far away. I feel like this is what I've been working my whole life for,.. for this very moment where I don't feel like I have it all.. but I certainly have the things that make me feel successful and proud. Happy Fourth of July to everyone that celebrates it! Current Mood:  sleepy | | Friday, June 30th, 2006 | | 1:15 pm |
June 14
its unfortunate knowing the place you know you've always belonged,... the place you feel best and safest is a place you aren't allowed. I booked my plane tickets today.. I cried for 2 hours straight. I know everything is going to be ok.. but I feel absolutely lost. I've got nothing when I go home.. no job.. No insurance, as far as I know.. I do have a car. I suppose I have a place to live. I have my parents and my sister.. But I can't stay here... I've got about 400 bucks to my name, a plane ticket, a boyfriend that will be 7 times zones away from me.. and a lot of materialistic bullshit. My parents will be thrilled that I'm home.. but what next? I feel like a 24 year old hopeless cause with no future. Please let this be PMS thats got me feeling so shitty. Current Mood:  lethargic | | Sunday, May 28th, 2006 | | 10:47 pm |
How much of the world has changed in two months? What a long time coming.. hopefully I can get through this without distraction. I've been here for nearly the same time that i was at my former address, and luckily the time has went by quite fast. I've decided it may just be that i'm not quite cut out for this job. And after receiving the billionith letter about being someone elses au pair I narrowed it down in a letter of disappointment to someone else, - I'm 24... almost,... years old,.. I don't need people who are only 10 or so years older than me telling what i can and cant do with my life. So luckily this is a temp position and I knew that from the beginning. My last day is something around the 26th of July and I'm probably going home sometime around the beginning of August. Luckily,.. I'm hopefully getting Michel to go with me. Perhaps for good. or well.. at least for a little while.. So,. I want to make a huge public apology to everyone for ignoring messages and not emailing overall being a terrible friend. 2 excuses: 1. My computer blows it constantly freezes.. and I am denied messages. and 2. I do much less.. but work so much more.. Wednesday i worked 14 hours straight. STRAIGHT. No breaks. So,.. two months without writing.. and perhaps two more because I'm so busy,.. people keep teling me to write but mostly I'm so tired by the end of the day all i want to do is sleep. I just want a job where I can seperate myself from my "office" at the end of the day.. I want to go home at "17:00" like the rest of the working world. My days of au pairing are almost over. Current Mood: sleepy | | Friday, March 31st, 2006 | | 2:16 pm |
So, perhaps the suspense is killing everyone... maybe not. By the skin of my teeth, I found another host family. I feel like I've already started out on the wrong foot with them, though. My current host family revealed to them that I eat bad things, and apparently I'm not active enough, so my new host family gave me a warning of sorts that the things that my current host family says I eat are not allowed in their house and how they are an active family so therefore I must... well ok Let's not go into this alread before I've even moved in. I'm just pissed off that my current family had the audacity to say that I do that stuff when I eat a TON less than them. I can barely finish one plate at dinner when they have two or three. I mostly don't eat snacks after 20:00.. they do. She drinks AS MUCH coke as I do, but still says that I drink more. She smokes, I don't. They proclaime that I don't eat fruit, and I sure as hell eat at least three pieces a day. I drink More water than everyone in this house combined. And I eat the same amount of fast food as them. They just feel the consistent need to find something to nag at me about, and they have now carried it over to my new host family. My mother gave me last weekend to find a host family or she was personally going to drag me home. LIVI! because this is such short notice, I'm moving tomorrow, I suppose I just need to get your address so I can just mail your books to you. Otherwise I will be back to Groningen to visit you all, so I could just meet up with you when I'm back in town. I have so much shit. I have no idea why I brought so much. Two large suitcases plus another small bag.. its just unbelievable. On top of that I have acquired so much more. I am tired. I feel like taking a nap, if it weren't fall all the crap I still have to do. Current Mood: tired | | Wednesday, March 22nd, 2006 | | 1:35 pm |
ok... where to start..? After Sunday I've been feeling a little down in the dumps about well.. myself and my situation. My host family apparently only see's me as a fat American that cleans too slow, so self-esteem went down the shitter. Yesterday, Jeanette and I had a talk about why I am the way I am, why I stay in my room most of the time, which has to do with my anxiety with her. She again was shocked but agreed that she has a very strong personality, but she doesn't want to worry about trying to please me, SO she thought it was best that I leave. In the end we both agreed, and I have til the Middle of April to find new means of survial in this country. Now its panic time trying to find those means and get moved. I feel tension in the house, especially from Jeanette, that I am moving. Its just so difficult to please her, and I don't think I could have stayed another 9 months losing sleep over trying to make sure she's consistently happy. Current Mood:  even mix of peace and panic | | Monday, March 20th, 2006 | | 4:55 pm |
| | Sunday, March 19th, 2006 | | 11:39 pm |
Dictate my Life...
Update: So, Boris and Jeanette asked to speak with me tonight. Tonight, aside from the very basics of they still don't like how I clean the house,.. tonight it was complaints about my personal life. They do not like my eating habits and they think I should change them. They do not how I like I spend my free time.. and they think I should change it. They do not like my cleaning habits for my personal space,.. and they think I should change it. The last is the only one I can feasibly understand, this is there house and I should respect that. I do not think the other two are any of their business, and blatantly I told them that. Jeanette does not think that I should have been paid for Fridays work because she was out getting tiles for my bathroom floor, despite that any sort of construction that must be done they are suppose to maintain, it is not my responsibility. I did voice my opinion that I did not agree to her opinion. I also voiced that I constantly feel like I'm walking on glass all the time. They were shocked by this and told me they thought I had no reason to feel this way. Current Mood:  discontent | | 7:21 pm |
wth was I thinking....? argh... My post just deleted itself, and when it asked me if I wanted to restore my draft.. all that was saved was one line. bah. SO... I worked 10 hours this weekend, although there was dispute that I didn't. This left me quite upset that they insisted that I only worked last night and this morning, after we discussed and finally agreed last night that Fridays hours that I worked for free could be counted as baby sitting hours as well. Tonight, they insisted that those hours don't count, even though they agreed to it last night. I ended up getting 50 euros anyway, even though they hesitated. 50 euros - 10 hours. unfortunately its not as simple as that, and I will never ever agree to this again. Friday I worked of course for 2 hours, Then last night after I returned from the movies, which I will discuss momentarily, I baby sat from 1 this morning until 4 when they returned from a party. Once I finally got to sleep, Silphen started crying at 5:30 this morning, so I was back up at 5:30, til 10:30 this morning with all three kids. In total I got 2.5 hours of sleep. Its funny that when Jeanette really wants something for herself she acts all sweet and friendly. Last night she REALLY wanted to go to this party with Boris, but I had already made plans for myself, and every time I make plans for myself that interrupt their plans, despite the fact that I'm off the clock, and they have no where else to send the kids they pester me over and over "So are you sure you want to go out?" ..:: blank stare::... Yes. I. Want. To. Go. Out. In the end she bargained with me and asked me if I would come home after my movie so she could go to the party and it was good for me, because I could make money.. which I desperately need right now.... I'm a fish.. and they have baited the hook perfectly. So they bargained with me more and asked if I wouldn't mind getting up this morning, while they slept out their hangovers, for a few extra bucks. I obliged because, ok, I have to be up at 7 when the kids get up, and they aren't much trouble.. except they all woke up this morning at 5:30.... :: defeated sigh:: Boris and Jeanette are true Managers... They know how to run over people and take advantage of people to their advantage. I need to be my own fucking boss... I can't stand people. Where is the fucking humanitarianism in this fucking world? OK.. For a more positive side to this post... :D Last night I went out with ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.1) montymark to see Syriana. Ok... The movie was nice. Much like Mark said, it had great cinematography and the acting I feel was superb -it was nice to see Matt Damon in a not so naive or sweetheart character, but something much more human, despite this characters manipulative and asshole tendencies. And it was also nice to see George Clooney outside of his normal realm as well in a... depressing type character, someone who is not necessarily down on his luck BUT someone that you can really pity. He tries so hard to get ahead and he has such the ability but people keep running over him. It was nice to see Americans as the bad guy as well. HOWEVER, this movie definitely needs a flyer handed out after the movie diagramming who knew who and how they were connected and what they actually stood for. There were SO many story lines going on and SO many characters it was really difficult to understand exactly what was going on. Not to mention, just as in the states where foreign languages in films would be subtitled into English, the foreign languages when brought to the Dutch big screen are translated naturally into Dutch. I spent half the movie only catching half of what was being said when foreign languages were spoken, except for the parts where Mark translated it for me. It was definitely an emotionally driven movie, but I'm not sure I could sit through it a second time. To make sense of it, I think it would be needed, but this two hour drama felt like a 3.5 hour epic. After the movie we shook off the tension of the movie by grabbing a couple of beers. I arrived home an hour later than I said I might arrive home. But Jeanette didn't seem too upset. Of course not she wouldn't have to deal with her own kids for the next 12 hours. But back to the bar scene, Mark and I chatted it up and agreed to go out again sometime. He's really great fun to go out with. This is going to be a strange week unlike, all the past weeks. Most times I only work Monday thru Thursday but this week I will work Friday.. This is very depressing for me because I was hoping to leave for HHW after 19:00 on Friday night. Now I don't that I will be able to as I have to work til at least 20:00 Friday night. Perhaps things will look up for me, and luck will prevail again, perhaps I will leave at 20:00,... and all will be well. I hope so.. I'm ready to sleep in the arms of the man I love. Random thought: I really want a sea otter, I believe they are my favourite animal... and have been all my life. Current Mood: exhausted | | Saturday, March 18th, 2006 | | 5:45 pm |
I feel like making another post and I don't really care how many I've made today... So,... I watch the children for free yesterday.. I watched the children for free today.. I normally watch the children for free quite often. I did Jeanette's Laundry today.. and I cleaned up her kitchen even though I haven't ate from it today. FOR FUCKS SAKE. I MIGHT BE HERE ON THE WEEKEND.. BUT I HAVE NO FUCKING HOURS LEFT.. And all she has said to me today.. is not "thank you"... no.. heaven forbid she thank me.. all she said was "When is the last time you cleaned your bathroom? Its filthy." Yeah this is coming from the woman that never vacuums or dusts. I'm just really getting sick and tired of unappreciative people. It makes me want to go on a violent rampage. Seriously. | | 2:55 pm |
Monday night I pined... I was waiting at the bus stop, waiting for my bus. I was eating a sandwich as I waited. There to my right, with his back turned toward me was a tall man in a black coat, with his collar slightly turned up. His hair short, straight, gelled, and champagne blonde. His stature -broad shoulders, strong and fit body, and slender hips. and from behind he looked just like my Michel... and I pined.. Current Mood:  nostalgic | | 10:04 am |
what to do, what to do? So, I was sort of irrational yesterday (and bitchy last night). I said that I would use all 35 Euros if I had to. Now I have plans with montymark for the movies today, sometime, but I have been considering my other plans. 8 Euros for the museum ~10 Euros for lunch and ~10 euros at the movies. That leaves me with 7 Euros that I was gonna spend on drinks, Sunday, with Magdalena. And that leaves me NO money for next weekend, especially if I don't get paid. And I miss my boyfriend. So I will go to the movies this weekend. And I will go for drinks. And I will save some of my money for a trip to Heerhugowaard. And I will go to a museum and lunch another time. | | Friday, March 17th, 2006 | | 11:42 am |
Some Devil
bleh.. right as I begin to write this, I am asked to work.. 2 hours for free. I am done with my hours for the week, after all. :/ So.. a few things for me to post about. This house is starting to freak me out a little bit. I'm not in the mood to go into such great detail about my theories or opinion, but a couple of nights ago, I was dead asleep when all of a sudden I heard a tapping noise at my window. It wasn't any random tapping, it was more like someone knocking at my window (which is on the second floor). This was 2 in the morning. I was more than just a little freaked out, I was terrified. I debated for a while if I should open the curtains to see if perhaps my window was open, just in case, but I regarded that it was safer to stay in bed. Eventually, I fell back asleep and woke up the next morning, thankfully. My window was luckily not open but still the nights following I have went to bed with an uneasy feeling. Also, this past week, one morning, I was with the younger children, when all of a sudden in the corner of the room near one of the fireplaces, it sounded as though there had been a plant tipped over and all of the water was pouring out of it. When I say a plant tipped over, I don't mean per se that I heard something like a glass pot shattering, but instead like someone turned the plant upside down and all of the topsoil and water was racing to the ground, it was loud and nearby. It wasn't some noise I heard outside that made its way inside, no, it sounded as though it was happening right next to me. I checked around the fireplace to see if anything had spilled and found nothing. I looked to Lois to see if she had experienced the same thing I had, but apparently the sound hadn't phased her. The childrens' toys sound off at random, which I will take as being overuse/abuse or malfunction, etc. It weirds me out, but I have a better time explaining to myself there is something... plausible that's causing them to go off without the hands of a child. Even the knocking at my window I will try to persuade myself is something other than... well.. mysterious. But the water sound, I cannot explain. It sounded, like I said, as though a plant had been toppled over,.. or an extremely LARGE rainstick that had just been flipped over. The sound was loud and piercing. And mind you, there should be no water pipes, aside from the radiator, perhaps, that are present in that area. There are no bathrooms or kitchen, sinks, etc close to that corner of the house... Second order of Business, I will not be going to Heerhugowaard this weekend, and I'm quite upset about this. But I refuse to sit around here and be bored. I have 35 euros left, 5 - 7 of which I will spend on drinks with the Polish girl, Sunday. Roughly I have 30 euros til the end of March (probably next weekend), and I plan on using some of it (or well probably all of it) this weekend.. My plans: (1)To see the Groninger Museum,.. because frankly now is as good of a time as ever, (2)to see a movie -I will either see "Walk the Line" or "Syriana" (if either are playing, that is) because those two movies are on my to do list and (3) to go have a lunch at some quaint place. I have no problem with going by myself, to all three places, but if anyone wants to join me for all, for one or a couple, then the invitation is extended. This is in no way the set order, and I haven't really made final plans yet (I will by this evening, and I will post them -and my plans will be for tomorrow), these are just the things I know I would like to pursue. I have no idea where to eat, and I really don't like to wander around searching, I'd like to have an idea (Suggestions are welcome). I know I'm in the mood for a soup and (preferably warm) sandwich type deal, something like Panera Bread. I'd prefer to go to a matinee, because I assume (perhaps I'm wrong) its (semi-)cheaper. I'm ready to do somethings for myself for a change. I'm ready to be fulfilled again. I'm growing tired and bored. I need to do laundry. I had a third thing to write about, but I've since forgot it. Aleks should be in England by now. :/ Current Mood:  accomplished | | Wednesday, March 15th, 2006 | | 9:55 pm |
I know he doesn't mean to make me cry.. I KNOW how busy he is.. I know its all for the future, perhaps our future.. But it hurts my feelings. He can make time for his friends, but not for me, even in these busy times. I've barely got to talk to him this week. God this all feels vividly familiar... about 7 months ago familiar.. ... :: blank::... Optimism fails me. I am not going where I'm not wanted, even out of pity. I will stay here this weekend, I refuse to be the burden on anyone. Even though it is his birthday. Current Mood:  disappointed | | 10:12 am |
Oh god.. Stolen from someone who knows someone who is someone that I think I met at a party..
15 Years Ago I:1) Was close to 9 years old. 2) Was an insecure fat kid with bad teeth and a bad haircut, but I was friends with all the popular kids. I think they wanted my homework. 3) Got the opportunity to go to Summer Enrichment, a summer camp for the brightest kids in school. We were only allowed to go once, but my teachers loved me so much they sent me three times. 4) Had a fascination with Susan Whitaker. I wanted a Mickey Mouse watch just like hers that played "Its a Small World After All" 5) Had my first Slumber Party/Sleepover -with someone other than my cousins. 10 Years Ago I:1) Was almost 14 years old. 2) Still lived in the same house I had lived in for twelve years (and yes we still own that house, a total of 22 years). 3) Had Jaw surgery for my TMJ, my teeth were wired shut for six weeks, because they broke off a piece of my jaw the size of a quarter, instead of a dime. Try Yawning, Sneezing, And Coughing like that for a month and a half. Introduced myself to Eating Disorders. 4) Met David Fisher.. :: le dreamy sigh:: 5) Was dead set on being an Archaeologist... errr Interior Decorator, or uh Musician,... or uhm.. Museum Director... ahem. 5 Years Ago I:1) Was nearly 19 years old.. 2) Stayed out til 4 or 5 in the morning on the weekends with my then (high school sweetheart) boyfriend Nathan Shadowens. 3) Went to church every Sunday, because my punk ass boyfriend, see above, did so. I was in love and stupid. 4) Nearly lost all my close and true blue friends for my punk ass boyfriend, again above. 5) Transferred from one university to another... for my punk ass boyfriend, yes still the same boyfriend.. who dumped me as soon as I transferred. 3 Years Ago I:1) Was about to embark on 21 years old 2) Lived in Belgium (not to be confused with some tropical country like many people in my life thought). 3) Had many many love affairs, LOADS of hungover mornings, and rarely went to class. I went absolutely wild there for a while. 4) Met so many people I will be friends with for eternity, specifically Maarit and Spyros. 5) Contemplated Suicide. 1 Year Ago I:1) Was close to turning 23 years old. 2) Wrapped up my last year at University, finishing my degree in what I anticipated Archaeology 3) Loved a beautiful beautiful Dutch man, who let me into his life, but eventually broke my heart, only two weeks after us vowing we would never part. 4) Met the man I now love. Another beautiful Dutch man, that overflows my cup with Happiness and Satisfaction. I would literally and presently be lost without him. 5) Nearly decided to quit school, but I buckled down and went out with a bang my last semester making Straight A's (21 hours -THE most I've ever taken) and moving to the Netherlands. Yesterday I:1) Worked 10 hours with no break. 2) Considered in much further detail that I should do Yoga. 3) Feel like I made about 193 posts and watched Grey's Anatomy. 4) Had a really sweet and deep conversation with my boyfriend about missing each other and in the future everything will get better. 5) Ate Fish Stir Fry in silence as my host family jabbered in Dutch. Today I:1) Intentionally slept an hour later and Woke up bright eyed and bushy tail. 2) Had a peanut Butter Sandwich and a glass of cola for breakfast. 3) Will probably talk to my mother. 4) Might have to work and will possibly go out and take care of Michel's birthday gift. 5) Have class. Tomorrow I:1) Will hopefully leave for HHW. 2) Am a day older. 3) Should do (My own) laundry. 4) Work another 10 hours 5) Hope it is warmer.. Current Mood: accomplished | | 9:30 am |
a Tri-Part post.
Holy Shit.. I was going through krootasaurusrex's friends, friend-link hopping, and I got to the very last name zontanos and I thought to myself,... "pfft.. wouldn't this be funny if this were Jared..." Holy fuck it was. Of course he never posted anything, or possibly deleted all his post,.. and it looks like he set this journal up like... 2-3 years ago, at least, before he graduated college and moved to... B'ham? but I was so shocked!.. gah.. I wish I would have known this a long time ago.. I could have kept in touch with him.. Oh how i miss Jared. :/ Everyone needs a little cynic in their lives.. on a totally opposite end of the spectrum,... probably for the past oh 6 weeks, I've had on loop in my head, Dolly Parton -Hard Candy Christmas. now,... Its not christmas..and I definitely didn't hear it this past Christmas,... and I CERTAINLY haven't heard that song here. This a song of my childhood, when christmases were shiny and warm and happy, and magical... when I wasn't old enough to consider that commercialism sucked the life out of something pure and wholesome. This song on loop in my head isn't driving me crazy... but it does make me wonder if I am missing my family much more than I give in to thinking... Ever heard all of the windows out of a house or building shatter? I believe that's just what I heard.. the sound was shrill and eerie.. I wonder where it was. | | 12:20 am |
I have been considering lately that I should wake up earlier in the mornings and do some Yoga. I'm not your average caffeine fanatic that needs coffee or so to wake up,.. I don't feel awake until I have stretched my whole body pretty thoroughly. Problem is I wouldn't know where to begin. I don't really enjoy working out, but I think I would like Yoga. I'm pretty sure it would be rewarding, both for waking up and to return to a more limber state,... like I was when I was a child. Not to mention, Yoga is pretty low maintenance, no? I like the sensation of feeling my back popping from stretching... I hope I can run up all my hours by Thursday night, I really hope I have to work tomorrow. I REALLY want to be able to leave on Thursday night, or Friday Morning. Its apparent I'm PMS'ing this week... I am eating everything in near sight,... oi vey... Here's looking forward to next week.. :/ Thank god for the pill keeping things in check. Current Mood: calm | | Tuesday, March 14th, 2006 | | 7:53 pm |
Dedicated to Axel..
kijk---> The first thing I thought of when I saw raw_angus's new icon, was Axel. So if you still read this, and I kinda figure you do, and because I know you have me blocked, which I don't much care, maybe this icon will bring a smile or laugh to your face,.. because it reminded me of you at work... I, especially, like the part where the customer lips over-emphasize "blue".. heh.. enjoy. Russ I will delete this after tomorrow or so, Just wanted to put it up for him to see.. Current Mood: full | | Monday, March 13th, 2006 | | 5:19 pm |
ganked from raw_angus *List 10 things you want to say to people but know you never will. *Don't say who they are. *Disable comments. *Never discuss it again. 1.Everyone's shit stinks, don't forget it. Most people aren't your friends -they are your followers, they're afraid of you. And you adore it, stop acting like you don't. 2. No one really needs to know every minute detail. Where is your mystery? 3. Stop falling for someone new, every minute. It's like crying wolf, after a while it loses its face value. 4. I will never forgive you. 5. Sometimes you are stubborn, sometimes you are ridiculously immature, but I love your faults just as much as I love your best attributes. Silence never has or never will be uncomfortable with you. 6. You can feel bad if it makes you feel better. However constantly playing the victim is not attractive on you.. or anyone for that matter. 7. Let go. Don't be afraid to embrace who you are. So its not mainstream, it's ok to reflect several characters and to be aware of it. No one fits perfectly into one mold. All that matters is that you know who you are and that you are comfortable with it. Everyone else will follow suit with your comfort. 8. Grow a heart or at least use some some softener on the piece of stone otherwise known as your heart. 9. I'm sorry if I fucked up your life by telling you what I thought was best for you, and not considering what you thought was best for yourself. You could have done so much more with yourself than what you have accomplished, and I consider it all rebellion against me. 10. Sometimes your emotional attachment grinds my last nerve. Sometimes your shallow ability to think outside of the opposite sex and material items aggravates me, but I know you are true blue.. always. |
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